Poem · Poetry

My city at night

Have you ever
Heard your city at night?
She will talk to you
Of what she saw in the light.

Talk of the lovers who kissed
for the first time on the bridge and
the homeless man below it,
weakened more today,
closer to death a little bit.

Politicians talking of welfare
in front of a crowd,
and plotting warfare
as soon as the masks come down.

I see it all,
I hear it all
and I bear it all.

Still, if ever
you need a listening ear
and a friend near,
you will find me here.

Just come over
at night, when everyone sleeps.
Stand on a bridge
Feel the wind in your hair
Stare into the dark waters below.

Or go to a park
Feel the air in your lungs
Rest your hand on a tree
Dig your heels in the soil.

I am here, with you
Through it all
Tell me your story
And I will tell you mine.

You and I,
We shall be fine.

feel good · Healing · love · Poem · Poetry · Spiritual

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I look for you when I am alone

The only one who felt like home

.

Frantically, my panic has grown

Then I realize –

In everything,

In my very being, 

you are shown

.

You are me and I am you

I am not alone

Healing · life · music · Poem · Poetry · Spiritual

Every narcissist’s downfall…unending desire

Narcissists keep collecting a lot of bad karma/deeds in their life. Most of these deeds are done because of the desires that a narcissist has. Narcissist’s desires keep them unsatisfied and always in a state of unease. They cannot really surrender to life and the moment that is. They are always either playing a victim or hero about something in the past or they are projecting into the future, working towards a certain goal. Either way, the present moment is not satisfactory for them. They are never present.

The song below is a great warning to all narcissists. Informing them of their impending doom and grounding them to reality. It is a bit dark but a helpful warning to anyone who is too much into their ego.

Song and translation is given below. It is from a Pakistani drama OST. The drama is called ‘Wabaal’ which means – calamity, ruin, misfortune, crime, sin.

Meaning :

You are a crazy, wild and unwise person

About what small thing are you going to stir up drama now?

Stop taking this physical world so seriously

This wrestling (ego-fights in the world) are going to stop with as soon as you leave this world (when you die)

.

This desire is a whirlpool

There is no end to it

Desire is such a prayer

Which doesn’t satisfy ever

.

Getting your desires is not in your will

.

Human, o human

Don’t keep following your desires

Everything is God/Source/Consciousness

You are nothing

x2

.

If you listen to the heart’s desires,

it will tell you to get the Moon on the Earth.

And then you will want it’s glow

to be attached on your clothes.

.

If you want to swim

in the ocean of your desires,

Trade yourself for it

And forget your happiness

.

Don’t be in a relationship with only what your heart wants

Sometimes learn to surrender to what is happening

God/Source/Consciousness has given you so many blessings

Sometimes sit alone and count all of them

.

Desires are like conspiracies

They will ask you questions

They will make you sell yourself

And make you commit many sins/mistakes

.

Every minute, you will crave for peace (but you won’t get it)

It will make your life that absurd

.

This desire is a whirlpool

There is no end to it

Desire is such a prayer

Which doesn’t satisfy ever

.

Getting your desires is not in your will

.

Human, o human

Don’t keep following your desires

Everything is God/Source/Consciousness

You are nothing

x2

.

You are a crazy, wild and unwise person

About what small issue are you going to stir up drama now?

Ebook

Affirmations for pregnant women

20-page Reiki infused ebook PDF – for pregnant women who find themselves with a narcissistic family or a narcissistic spouse, on sale for 7$ USD. You can view it on your laptop, phone, tablet.

It is very difficult to have a healthy, stress-free pregnancy when around narcissists. Pregnancy is a difficult time as it is, where the mother is taking care not just of herself but the baby growing inside her. However, around narcissists it is very difficult to get the support needed to go through this period. Having been through this situation I have written this book of affirmations to help other pregnant women thrive. and feel supported. Wishing for you or your loved one a safe, sound, happy and healthy pregnancy.

If you would like to purchase one, please email me : recoveryfromnarc@gmail.com. Here is a sneak peak of some pages. 🙏🏼💚

music · Poem · Poetry

I saw my beloved in all I saw

Once a human does enough work on their spirituality and integrates all aspects of their broken psyche – they will start seeing some part of themselves being reflected in everyone. This feeling of oneness is precious. There is no other, all are one. In such a state of oneness, a person starts knowing everyone as a manifestation of the supreme beloved who is the creator, sustainer and destroyer of this reality that we all play a part in. It is a bliss to be in this state of oneness.

Here is a beautiful Kalaam (spiritual discourse) by Hazrat Shah Niyaz (Sufi poet) sung by the amazing Sufi singer Abida Parveen. This Kalaam discusses how a person who has experienced this kind of oneness will then see God/Creator/Beloved in every person whom they meet. My translation & interpretation of it is below the video.

Meaning :

I am needy person, who needs you

I will feel very dearly the sorrow for a beloved like you

You are the Sun; my eye is alight with your beauty

If I give you up, to whom can I go?

.

I saw my beloved in all I saw

At times revealed, hidden at times

.

At times a possibility, at times imperative

At times ephemeral, at times eternal

.

At times Creator was an emperor with an addiction of power and the throne

At other times, was seen as a beggar with a begging bowl in hands

.

At times in the form of a beautiful lover

Creator was showing charms and grace

.

At times a lover like Shah Niyaz Ahmad (poet’s name)

He was seen beating his chest in grief with a heart full of pain

.

At times revealed, hidden at times

I saw my beloved in all I saw

.

Top image is roof of Hafez’s tomb (Hāfezieh) located in Shiraz, Iran.

Ebook

The night and I talk about you

31-page love-Reiki infused ebook PDF – features 18 short poems and beautiful pictures for sale for 7$ USD.

Poetry is often a way an aching heart expresses itself. When a person has been through NPD, BPD, HPD trauma – their perception of love becomes extremely skewed. Popular culture does not help it either – it shows an extremely toxic view of love. In such a world situation, poetry from lesser-known but life-experienced poets, is where I found some understanding of what genuine, true, pure, innocent love should feel like. Wish to share it with you. 💙🙏🏼 

If you would like to purchase one, please email me : recoveryfromnarc@gmail.com. Here is a sneak peak of some pages. 🙏🏼💚

Ebook

Bucketful of pride after narcissistic abuse

22-page PDF ebook, each page infused with Reiki to make the reader feel proud of themselves again, to imbibe in the reader a sense of self-worth, self-acceptance and self-love. Narcissistic experiences negatively influence a person’s self-image and self-confidence, this book hopes to combat the adverse effects of narcissistic abuse on a person’s Manipur chakra (Solar plexus chakra) – hence, the bright yellow color. Each page of this book is infused with Reiki energy to help the reader heal and balance out their center of being. It costs 7$ USD

If you would like to purchase one, please email me : recoveryfromnarc@gmail.com. Here is a sneak peak of some pages. 🙏🏼💚

Ebook

Poems & interpretations

This 18 page long ebook contains 4 poems that guided me through some very dark times in my life along with their interpretations. It costs 5$ USD. You can view it on your laptop, phone, tablet.

If you would like to purchase one, please email me : recoveryfromnarc@gmail.com. Here is a sneak peak of some pages. 🙏🏼

Ebook

14 days of self-care

This PDF ebook is a 33 page long guide for some tips on spending 14 days taking care of yourself. It costs 10$ USD. You can view it on your laptop, phone, tablet.

If you would like to purchase one, please email me : recoveryfromnarc@gmail.com. Here is a sneak peak of some pages. 🙏🏼

feel good · life · love · Poem · Poetry · Spiritual

Union with the beloved

I am not an expert in Sufism, just a student of it. I once heard an interview of a Sufi Sheikh who said something to the effect of – “All of life is a coping mechanism before we meet the beloved (the creator) again”

To me, this statement hit really deep.

That is why many Sufi songs will refer to God as a lover or beloved. Here is one such beautiful song by a wonderful singer called Romy. The song is called ‘Sanu ik pal chain na aave’ (I cannot be satisfied for even one second). The original was made famous by the legendary Ustad Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan. Please find the lyrics and translation to the one sung by Romy below :

Lyrics and meaning :

.

Sanu ik pal chain na aave

I can’t find satisfaction even for a second

Sajna tere bina

Without you my love

Dil kamla dub dub jaave

My crazy heart keeps on sinking

Sajna tere bina

Without you my love

Sajna tere bina

Without you my love

.

Raati mein jalava diva

At night I burn the lamp

Hanjua de tel da

With my tears as the oil

Hayyo rabba, sanjana nu

Oh my God, my love –

Chheti kyun ni mel da

Why don’t you meet me quickly

.

Sanu ik pal chain na aave

I can’t find satisfaction even for a second

Sajna tere bina

Without you my love

Dil kamla dub dub jaave

My crazy heart keeps on sinking

Sajna tere bina

Without you my love

Sajna tere bina

Without you my love