
The silences in us

poem interpretations & more
Have you ever
Heard your city at night?
She will talk to you
Of what she saw in the light.
Talk of the lovers who kissed
for the first time on the bridge and
the homeless man below it,
weakened more today,
closer to death a little bit.
Politicians talking of welfare
in front of a crowd,
and plotting warfare
as soon as the masks come down.
I see it all,
I hear it all
and I bear it all.
Still, if ever
you need a listening ear
and a friend near,
you will find me here.
Just come over
at night, when everyone sleeps.
Stand on a bridge
Feel the wind in your hair
Stare into the dark waters below.
Or go to a park
Feel the air in your lungs
Rest your hand on a tree
Dig your heels in the soil.
I am here, with you
Through it all
Tell me your story
And I will tell you mine.
You and I,
We shall be fine.
I look for you when I am alone
The only one who felt like home
.
Frantically, my panic has grown
Then I realize –
In everything,
In my very being,
you are shown
.
You are me and I am you
I am not alone
Once a human does enough work on their spirituality and integrates all aspects of their broken psyche – they will start seeing some part of themselves being reflected in everyone. This feeling of oneness is precious. There is no other, all are one. In such a state of oneness, a person starts knowing everyone as a manifestation of the supreme beloved who is the creator, sustainer and destroyer of this reality that we all play a part in. It is a bliss to be in this state of oneness.
Here is a beautiful Kalaam (spiritual discourse) by Hazrat Shah Niyaz (Sufi poet) sung by the amazing Sufi singer Abida Parveen. This Kalaam discusses how a person who has experienced this kind of oneness will then see God/Creator/Beloved in every person whom they meet. My translation & interpretation of it is below the video.
Meaning :
I am needy person, who needs you
I will feel very dearly the sorrow for a beloved like you
You are the Sun; my eye is alight with your beauty
If I give you up, to whom can I go?
.
I saw my beloved in all I saw
At times revealed, hidden at times
.
At times a possibility, at times imperative
At times ephemeral, at times eternal
.
At times Creator was an emperor with an addiction of power and the throne
At other times, was seen as a beggar with a begging bowl in hands
.
At times in the form of a beautiful lover
Creator was showing charms and grace
.
At times a lover like Shah Niyaz Ahmad (poet’s name)
He was seen beating his chest in grief with a heart full of pain
.
At times revealed, hidden at times
I saw my beloved in all I saw
.
Top image is roof of Hafez’s tomb (Hāfezieh) located in Shiraz, Iran.
I am not an expert in Sufism, just a student of it. I once heard an interview of a Sufi Sheikh who said something to the effect of – “All of life is a coping mechanism before we meet the beloved (the creator) again”
To me, this statement hit really deep.
That is why many Sufi songs will refer to God as a lover or beloved. Here is one such beautiful song by a wonderful singer called Romy. The song is called ‘Sanu ik pal chain na aave’ (I cannot be satisfied for even one second). The original was made famous by the legendary Ustad Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan. Please find the lyrics and translation to the one sung by Romy below :
Lyrics and meaning :
.
Sanu ik pal chain na aave
I can’t find satisfaction even for a second
Sajna tere bina
Without you my love
Dil kamla dub dub jaave
My crazy heart keeps on sinking
Sajna tere bina
Without you my love
Sajna tere bina
Without you my love
.
Raati mein jalava diva
At night I burn the lamp
Hanjua de tel da
With my tears as the oil
Hayyo rabba, sanjana nu
Oh my God, my love –
Chheti kyun ni mel da
Why don’t you meet me quickly
.
Sanu ik pal chain na aave
I can’t find satisfaction even for a second
Sajna tere bina
Without you my love
Dil kamla dub dub jaave
My crazy heart keeps on sinking
Sajna tere bina
Without you my love
Sajna tere bina
Without you my love
You create
I can only imitate.
You are the only one
Creating a masterpiece
every moment.
How is it possible
That your glory be denied?
How can someone
Be so far from the truth?
One sunset, one sunrise
Can change a life.
Here’s hoping
You continue being the artist
And I keep getting inspired
To imitate you.
What remains after we are dead and gone
Only love
What is true in this world of illusions
Only love
Trauma heals and transmutes into forgiveness
In this lifetime or the next
But when love touches someone
It cannot be undone
It transforms and heals all that is unloved
And only love remains
.
.
.
Park benches which give testimony of such love :
Humans, since the day they are born are wired for attachment. Undo-ing this wiring takes a long time and many instances of separation that trigger the human’s need for this attachment. Many say that the original wound of separation happens when a life manifests from the formless (realm of pure light or unconditional love) into the realm of form, i.e., our world where things are perceived through the mind. Only after letting go of this attachment can a human again experience wholeness, a sense of being perfect, a sense of unconditional love, joy and peace. Here is a beautiful Sufi song, written by the famous Indian poet – Gulzar and sung by the amazing Rekha Bharadwaj. The song depicts loss, craving for the other after the separation and finally Grace descends on the ones who suffer and Grace enlightens them and takes them towards feeling the sense of union with the creator, with the formless – filing them with love, peace and joy. Hoping on this beautiful full moon day (it is a full moon while I write this) you are able to release all the energies that keep you from living your best possible life. Hoping everything that you need to release in order to live a life for your highest good, gets released today.
Lyrics :
Tere ishq mein, haay tere ishq mein
Raakh se ruukhi, koyale se kaali
Raat kate na, hizraan waali
Tere ishq mein, haay tere ishq mein
Teri justaju, karate rahe
Marate rahe, tere ishq mein
Tere ruu-ba-ru, baithe hue
Marate rahe, tere ishq mein
Tere ruu-ba-ru, teri justaju
Tere ishq mein, haay tere ishq mein
Baadal dhune, mausam bune
Sadiyaan ginin, lamhe chune
Lamhe chune, mausam bune
Kuchh garm the, kuchh gungune
Tere ishq mein, baadal dhune
Mausam bune, tere ishq mein
Tere ishq mein, haay haay tere ishq men
Tere ishq mein tanhaaiyaan, tanhaaiyaan tere ishq mein
Hamane bahut, bahalaaiyaan
Tanhaaiyaan, tere ishq mein
Ruuse kabhi, manawaaiyaan
Tanhaaiyaan, tere ishq mein
Mujhe toh kar, koi din gaya
Mujhe chhed kar, koyi shab gayi
Mainne rakh li saari aahatein
Kab aayi thi shab kab gayi
Tere ishq mein, kab din gaya
Shab kab gayi, tere ishq mein
Tere ishq mein, haay haay tere ishq mein
Raakh se ruukhi, dil sufi tha
Hum chal diye, jahaan le chala
Tere ishq mein, ham chal diye
Tere ishq mein, haay tere ishq mein
Translation :
In your love
Drier than ash, darker than coal
This night of separation doesn’t end
In your love, in your love
I craved for you
I died, in your love
Sitting beside you
I died, in your love
Sitting beside you, I desired you
In your love, in your love
The clouds came singing, I knitted many seasons (waiting for you)
I counted centuries, I knitted many past moments from memory (waiting for you)
The clouds came singing, I knitted many seasons (waiting for you)
Some seasons were warm, some lukewarm
In your love, the clouds sang
I knit many seasons in your love
In your love, in your love
In your love there is loneliness, so much loneliness in your love
I have tried amusing myself so many times
So much loneliness in your love
Sometimes when I got angry, I consoled myself
So much loneliness in your love
Knocking me over (with sadness), some days passed me
Teasing me, an evening passed me
I have memorized all of your memories, even the sound of your footsteps
When did the day come (when you came) and when it went away (when you left)
In your love, in your love
More dry than ash, my heart was a Sufi (ascetic)
I started walking wherever it led me (towards you)
In your love, I started walking towards you
In your love, in your love
I can see it bubbling inside
Inside your steel caged heart.
The one you put a lid on
To keep your poker face on.
I want to reach that joy
No, not to steal it away.
But to color you with it
So that with you
It will always stay.
God made you in the God mind
and then God threw his head back
and smiled.
A thousand suns filled the sky
and started setting one after another
in a golden ocean.
And that’s how you were made.